Man prepared to fight to keep foster children
DYFS tells Plumsted family boys must be returned to mother
BY JANE MEGGITT
Staff Writer

VERONICA YANKOWSKI staff Kurry Walsh, New Egypt, intends to fight the state Division of Youth and Family Services for custody of foster children currently living in his home.

Two young boys placed in Kurry Walsh’s home as foster children have become an important part of his family.

"They are my sons," he said.

Walsh, New Egypt, feels so strongly about the 3- and 4-year-old brothers that he and his wife, Cindi, have been taking care of for nearly two years that he intends to wage a fight to adopt them.

However, the state Division of Youth and Family Services (DYFS) and the Family Court system have decided otherwise — they want the children to be returned to their natural mother.

Walsh, the manager of Rick’s Saddle Shop in Cream Ridge, and his wife decided to become foster parents after the events of Sept. 11, 2001, when they "took stock of their lives."

At the time, Cindi was doing volunteer work at Angels Wings, run by St. Francis Hospital, Trenton. The group operates a safe house, where children taken out of their parents’ custody are brought by DYFS.

She was working there in February 2001, when two young boys were brought in for help. They were soon sent to a foster home.

A few months later, when the Walshes decided to become foster parents themselves, Angels Wings called them to say the boys had to be displaced.

When Walsh saw the condition the kids were in, "I knew we had to do something. The [foster] home was state-certified, but it was very bad. I knew we had to get them out of there.

"We had to take courses to become fosters. There was PATH training (Parents Are Tender Healers) and security checks," he said.

The Walshes were approved in January 2002 and the children moved in with them. The boys are in a program called ARC, for the Adoption Resource Center.

"On a handshake, we were told the boys would be put up for adoption. Generally, [kids in ARC] are a [parental] signature away from being put up for adoption."

The boys came to live with them and joined the Walshes’ natural son, now 5.

"At 5, 4 and 3, they’re a pretty tight trio," Walsh said.

However, when they first arrived, Walsh said, the older one "could barely crawl. He’d been kept in a playpen 24 hours a day."

Both boys suffer from fetal alcohol syndrome and the eldest also has cerebral palsy, Walsh said.

Currently, the boys have a scheduled supervised visitation with their mother at a neutral site every other week.

Walsh says he has witnessed a foster care system in total disarray.

Although he and his wife were told that caseworkers would visit every 30 days, he claims there have been only five visits in 22 months.

The boys were brought to his home originally with no clothes or toys, which had been left at the previous foster home.

DYFS representatives had to take the children to a doctor for a physical exam before they could stay with the family. One child had a scar on his abdomen, and Walsh said he specifically asked DYFS to find out from the doctor what had caused it.

The representative told Walsh there was no record of what Walsh said is a very large scar, possibly from a surgery.

Both boys were suffering from medical issues when they arrived at his home, Walsh said.

"We took [the younger boy] to Camden Hospital, waited two hours, and the doctor said he couldn’t do [the surgery] because DYFS had changed nurses," and the new nurse decided the boy did not need a scheduled surgery to correct problems with his ears without seeing him.

"Foster parents are nobody. [DYFS] could care less what the foster parent feels," Walsh said.

Walsh said the Adoption and Safe Families Act means that "kids can’t be caught in the system. They must have a ‘life plan’ within 12 months. I’ve had these kids for 22 months [with no plan]."

Joe Delmar, a spokesman for DYFS, explained.

"When we place children with families, foster care is a temporary arrangement," Delmar said.

"When foster children become available for adoption, foster parents are given the first consideration," Delmar continued. "A Family Court judge makes the final decision. If the parent meets the requirement of the court order, the judge can order the children to go back to their natural parents."

Delmar said the Adoption and Safe Families Act, a federal law passed in 1997, is intended to help place children in permanent homes. Prior to the law, many children spent their entire lives in foster care.

The guidelines are that if the child spends 15 out of 22 months in foster care, DYFS may file for termination of parental rights, he said.

When asked if the Walshes appear to meet this criteria, Delmar declined to comment because he was not familiar with their specific case.

However, he said decisions such as the one the Walshes are seeking are typically up to a judge, not DYFS.

"The judge always gives preference to the biological family," Delmar said. "We do have foster parents that, unfortunately, become very attached to the children. It’s the way the system is set up.

"If [natural] parents comply with the court order, and make the changes they have to make, they get the opportunity to get their kids back," he added.

On Aug. 8, the Walshes received a call from DYFS, saying they must give the children back to their birth mother. Although he was told he would receive more information within a few days, he has still not heard anything else from DYFS.

If the boys are returned to their mother, the Walshes will never be able to see them again, Walsh said.

"I can’t believe there is a judge out there who would look at this situation and think it is good," Walsh said.

But, he acknowledges the law is on the natural mother’s side.

"Certain things are unforgivable," Walsh said. "A 9-month-old baby covered in filth, wearing the same diaper for three days, with no food or drink…" His voice drifts off.

"Being a foster parent has been 100,000 times more difficult than I ever dreamed it would be. We’ve done everything the state has asked of us, and more.

"My wife took off 30 days of work last year to take the boys to specialists," he added.

If the children have to leave his home, Walsh said "it will kill our family. I will do everything humanly possible to let people know what the state has done. The real issue is DYFS. I was told by DYFS [when becoming the foster parent for the boys] that the state was trying to get the kids adopted as soon as possible.

"The kids will not comprehend what is happening when the time comes," he said.

"I don’t want to play hardball with little boys’ lives," he said. "I want people to know how insane this system is."